Just a thought…..how much do you hate the seasons changing after you lost a loved one. Maybe some are lucky enough not to have to go through the seasons changing, but if you are one of those people, do dread the next change of weather to come? It brings on a rush of memories you had with your loved one during that time of year. The worst is coming around year and year again to the season they passed in. Summer, the heat feels much heavier, thicker and makes you so groggy. Winter, it is so gloomy and cold you never seem to warm up. Fall and Spring hurt, the changes all around you make you feel as if the world is turning not knowing or understanding your pain. You almost fear change after something like this happens to you, even in the weather. Is it just seasonal depression or depression of the seasons you will be without your brother or sister?
Spring is hardest for me, when all that is dead comes back to life. But my brother doesn’t. And you are right the seasons make things worse for me too.
I wish there was a season for the grief, pain and hurt to disappear and we would have a moment or two with our loved one.
Hang on and take care.
Lynn
Spring is probably a hard time for a lot of people dealing with sibling loss. It is a time when most people get excited to be outside and feel the sun. I think that sometimes that is what makes spring such a hard time of year. Everyone else is looking forward to this time of year and you are dreading all the excited people.
I find the changing of seasons to be so difficult because I imagine what my brother would be doing if he were here. He’s not here to shovel away the new fallen snow, he’s not here to enjoy the hot summer days with, he can’t feel the wind and rain on his face like I can. It hurts. It is more painful than any physical pain I can imagine. I wish it was physical pain because then I could endure it more easily. Its like I’m leaving him behind on that date, in that season, farther and farther behind.